Parents: Please Stop Sending Sick Kids to Class
Sick kids in class put others at risk, including families at home. When to keep your kid home from school and what to do if you can’t.
I originally wrote this post in February 2019…but with schools starting to reopen, it seems more relevant now more than ever!
“That kid over there is sick.”
My husband nudged me to look in the right direction, but I didn’t need any help spotting the kid he was talking about.
Red circles around his eyes. Puffy, red nose. Coughing. Coughing. And more coughing.
Yea, that kid was totally sick. Just who a parent wants to see standing next to their kid in gymnastics class.
The woman sitting beside us in the observation area quickly turned around. “He’s not sick! He’s just been playing for a while and is tired.” She must have been his grandma and she obviously overheard us discussing her visibly sick grandson.
Maybe this kid didn’t have the flu. Though he could have the flu for all we know.
But even if this kid “only” had a cold, there’s no good reason to be at gymnastics class passing germs to all of his classmates and instructors.
We don’t want your kid’s germs!
Kids get sick. It’s just a part of life.
However, I think I speak for all parents when I say that we don’t want our kids picking up any more germs than they already do or bringing illness home with them.
Especially now.
In a house with three kids, including a 7-month old baby, even a cold is devastating!
It took our family almost an entire month to kick a cold during Christmas vacation. Our oldest likely brought it home from school, then the kids spread it to each other, one by one, and finally to my husband and I.
Because of our poor congested baby, no one got any sleep. Christmas was subdued with a house of sick kids. Fortunately, there was no school due to the holiday break, or our oldest would have missed at least a few days. As it was, she had to skip her tutoring sessions, which she loves.
We were all pretty miserable, on Christmas no less.
And we were fortunate that this was “only” a cold.
I don’t want to imagine the flu, or worse, making it’s way through our family or to our baby.
Related: What is a Prescription Savings Card & Is it Legit?
Even if you’re careful, germs spread FAST among kids.
As soon as we spotted the first signs of a cold, we got serious about trying to prevent it from spreading.
We instated a no-hugging, no kissing policy in our house.
We diligently washed hands – every 5 minutes it seemed!
Everyone drank tons of water and crammed vitamins.
And everyone still got sick.
But you know what we didn’t do?
We didn’t send any of our kids to their activities!
Even with all our efforts to prevent that annoying bug from spreading, every single person in our family caught it. Germs are pervasive, especially with kids who constantly touch their face and put stuff in their mouths.
So if you bring a sick kid to class, you’re pretty much guaranteeing that at least one of their classmates is going to pick up their germs, and bring it home to their own family.
Not cool.
When should sick kids stay home from school?
Most schools, daycares, or activity centers have policies about different types of illness and when to keep kids home.
Carelessness can lead to problems for other classmates and teachers.
However, policy or not, there are certain symptoms and conditions that warrant staying home or even a doctor visit.
If your kid has any of the following, keep them home:
- Fever — A fever of 100°F or higher is an indicator of illness or infection. Kids with a fever should stay home or possibly see a doctor if the fever is too high. Click here to learn more about fever in children and when to call the doctor.
- Vomiting — Whether it is caused by something contagious or not, if your child is throwing up then they likely don’t feel well enough to go to school or an activity.
- Diarrhea — This can be a sign of something contagious like a stomach virus, which you don’t want to spread to others. However, diarrhea can also lead to dehydration quickly, so you’ll want to keep your child home where you can be sure to give them plenty of fluids.
- Severe color or cough — A pervasive cough can be a symptom of serious (and contagious) conditions like whooping cough or viral bronchitis. In any case, your child is probably feeling pretty miserable and needs rest.
- Flu — The flu can be deadly for small children or those with a compromised immune system. If you know your child has the flu, do not take them to a public place.
- Pinkeye — Because it is highly contagious, many schools will send home children with pinkeye. If you’re unsure, get your child’s eye checked out so you’ll know whether it is in fact pinkeye, or something benign.
- Lice — Please, I’m begging you, keep them home!! Many schools are changing their policy on lice, allowing kids to stay in school so they don’t miss a minute of instruction. I don’t care about the policy. Lice suck. Treating a house is time-consuming and expensive. If you kid gets them, keep them home and treat them. Your fellow parents thank you.
Related: Try this Glitter Germy Hands Experiment with your kids to show them how easily germs spread and teach good hand washing habits!
What if I can’t keep my kid home from school?
I realize that many employers aren’t very understanding about sick kids. I used to work for a company who could care less about my own health, not to mention that of my family.
I get it. I really do.
A rise in the number of families with two working parents means that more kids are going to school with minor colds, and sometimes with more serious illnesses.
But here’s the thing.
With a little baby who hasn’t had a chance to get all her shots yet, I have to be protective mama bear.
Sending a kid to school with a runny nose and a cough might not seem like a big deal. Maybe they even act “fine.”
But it’s a big deal to us families with babies.
It’s a big deal to families with immunocompromised kids who can’t fight off minor bugs like the rest of us can.
And it’s an especially big deal now!
Look, allergies are one thing. Cold and flu are another story — and it’s not fair to try to hide symptoms (for example, using fever reducing medicines and sending them off to school before they’re truly well).
Also, there is no reason to bring a sick kid to extracurricular activities!
If you explain the situation, I’m sure that most people will be understanding and accommodating with make-up classes. They don’t want sick kids spreading germs at their gymnastics facility or tutoring center.
If your kid is sick, please keep them home. I promise I will too.
Some say the “village” is gone, but it doesn’t have to be that way. We’re all in this crazy journey of raising kids together, so let’s not make it any harder on each other than it already is.
Related: The New Trend of Schools Enforcing Dress Codes for Parents
More of our favorite parenting posts:
Why Experts Say Wearing a Jacket in a Car Seat is Dangerous
Toddler Sleep: One Overlooked Thing That’s Keeping them Awake at Night
10 Types of Cyberbullying ALL Parents Need to Know About
- “Mistletoe Margaritas” Christmas Margarita Recipe - December 1, 2024
- 25 Easy Christmas Crafts for Kids of All Ages - December 1, 2024
- Candy Cane Cookies - November 26, 2024
As a mom of two children with type one diabetes, I highly agree with your post. Please, think of others when your child is sick – you’d rather your child not get sick too. Plus, if your child is sick, he will feel better and get better faster if he’s resting at home.
Side note, your pop up ads and in-line ads are a little much for the viewer, I almost x’d out of your article because it was disturbing me from reading.
Thank you for the feedback Cindy! It’s a fine balance with ads between what is too much and what pays the bills 🙂
I send my kids to school with a cold. They stay home when they have symptoms listed in the school handbook that require them to stay home. If they have boogers running their nose and they are coughing, too bad so sad. We need to work and pay our bills. Not everyone is forunate to stay home. Now if they have a cold they can skip extracurricular activities.
My last employer (before I started my own business) was NOT family friendly at all, so I understand the pressure to keep a job and how hard that can be with young kids. It’s actually why I quit that job and chose to live on a strict budget for a year until I figured out my next step…but I digress. 😉 Allergies and the occasional sniffles are one thing, but a cold that seems mild for one kid can be devastating to a classmate that is immunocompromised, or a baby sibling at home with less immunity. Our baby got croup and strep from that the big girls brought home from school this year and it was really scary – we were talking to our doctor all day and almost had to go to the ER. I know the struggle of being a working mom, but I also know that I have a responsibility not to potentially get 30 other kids and their families sick too.
Sonya, please remember that there are families who also work full time AND have family members with NO immune system. So “just a cold” becomes a hospital stay or weeks off work or even death.
Y’all are being too nice…if your job is more important than the safety and welfare of other kids in your child’s school…perhaps you should homeschool your children.
Not everyone is fortunate to stay home? Well they will be now that you sent your sick kid to school.
Check it out you sorry excuse for a parent, I work 2 jobs and take care of my 2 kids full-time. First sign of illness, they stay home and I let my employer know I won’t be coming in or they can suck on my balls. Act like a grown-up, not a little beeesh. Such loyalty to your employer but not your own kids and the community they exist in… Thats sad. Have some respect for the fellow students, the teachers, and the other parents. Damn, imagine thinking past your own nose for a second…
I would love to keep my kid home when he’s sick. He has missed 9 days so far. He has never been in daycare or preschool so he is catching everything. Doctors told us it would happen. I got a truancy letter in the mail and promptly called the Assistant Principal to discuss. While understanding, she warned me that to avoid a date with the judge we now have to send our sick kid to school and let them he nurse determine Whether he is too sick to attend. So it isn’t always the parents’ fault, trust me. He has gotten croup twice so far where he woke up unable to breathe. We were up half the night and I still had to send him, dark circles under his eyes and all, and he wasn’t sent home. ??♀️
Hi Heidi – I completely understand where you’re coming from! Our 5-year old started kindergarten this year and she had previously done a part-time pre-k so she too caught everything for the first few months. And then she brought it home and our baby got sick too 🙁 Regardless, I kept our daughter home when she was sick – we got the warning letter and all that too. It’s a pain for sure, but they shouldn’t really do anything if you’ve documented it all.
i agree. I thought when I kept my child home from his illness, i was doing my due dilligence as a parent, that wanst until i got not one but 3 truancy letters threatening me. They expressed there school policy stating that the if they have the sniffles a sore throat or a mild cough then they should be in school. I felt forced to send them but only if they seemed ok. More then likely at least 70 percent of other parents are doing the same so instead of getting pissed off at us try preaching this to the school districts. You really think we all want to send our kids to school like this when we cant see whats really going on with them? come on dont judge. Now What i do find irritating is the parents that take there kids to playgrounds sick as a dog. Now that is a concious choice.
Oh, I’ve definitely been in touch with the school district too! 😉 I don’t think it’s fair that parents are put in a situation or harassed when they try to keep sick kids home (as one should). But keep in mind that a letter is just a letter…if you have documentation (from you or a doctor), you should be fine.
Yes !!! PLEASE STOP SENDING SICK KIDS TO SCHOOL!!! As a mom of 2. I completely understand having to work However, I have 2 autoimmune diseases! My kid getting sick can often land a person like me in the hospital! Please be considerate of others who are immune suppressed! The hospital bills may kill me before my disease does ?
Not only do the kids get sick, but us teachers get sick!! Who will teach your child when we are sick? Please keep your sick children home. No one said that you have to stay home. Surely you have a friend or family members that can help you out!!
Well all my children are grown in their 20s but I get the struggle.Having 3 children 5 and under and being a single parent it is hard when you work.. I was lucky enough to find a private sitter that would watch my children with her own sick so they would all be contained at home and I could work I did get some truant notes and hell the school system sent me to truancy court fro my sons absences from having strep etc.. But whatever my kid was miserable and wasn’t gonna learn well anyways
Your heading states “what to do if you can’t keep them home, but all your text states is when to keep them home, so, where’sthe article on what to do? As a society we should be moving towards a solution for children staying at home for sickness where a parent doesnt have to jeopardize the job that feeds them. Before anyone starts in with “you dont have to stay home to keep your kids home” ok.. grandma has copd, and other ailments that keep her immune system compromised, you think she wants to keep your kid with the flu? Doubt it. Im sure she wants to help, but you want your mom to get the flu and cause potentially life threatening issues? Say you’re in the minimal amount of people who have friends that do not work. You think they want to keep your kid with strep throat? I’m going to go ahead and tell you no. So I read the text looking for the “what to do if you can’t keep them home”
hello you can be contagious without signs of a cold so it’s not always the sick child. Practice good hygiene.
Before you complain that parents shouldn’t be sending their children to school sick, you might want to look at the situation from the perspective of those who are less fortunate than yourself. There are plenty of times when single parents wish they could stay home with their sick child. There are times when they feel very guilty about sending their child to school when they know it would be nice if they could keep the child at home. But that isn’t always an option.
Single parents have one income and one income only. If they have multiple young children, that could leave them in a situation where they have to miss more days from work than they have available, especially if they’re in a new job. The last thing a single parent wants or needs is to lose their job because they took too many sick days. And if they’re paid an hourly wage or don’t have sick days accumulated because they’re only working part-time? Then it’s even worse for them financially. They may truly be living paycheck-to-paycheck through no fault of their own, particularly if two-parent family suddenly becomes a one-parent family for whatever reason.
Not all single parents have local relatives who can stay home with their sick children either. Maybe they don’t live in the same city as the rest of their family. Maybe they don’t have any other family at all. Maybe their relatives all work and can’t afford time off from work for one reason or another. So if their kids are sick, that single parent may be the only one available to stay home with their sick child. They have to save their sick days from work for when their children or, they themselves, have a high fever or some other illness that requires them to stay home.
Please don’t make assumptions about what other people should or shouldn’t do, or can or can’t do, based on your own life circumstances. Other people have issues of which you are completely unaware. Don’t assume those people are being selfish or that those people have options that simply don’t exist for their personal situations. You don’t know.
So unless you’re going to provide a solution while you’re providing a complaint, you might just want to rethink your complaint.
Hi Michelle – Yes, at present, I do work from home and have the ability to keep my kids home with me when sick. Though when they’re sick, I don’t get work done either.
However, in the past, we were a one income family and I have also worked at a job that was NOT understanding and threatened me with firing when I took care of my kids and new baby. They even tried to push me out when I was recovering from a C-section to the point that I returned to work at 2 weeks to make sure we didn’t lose that paycheck. So I get it. There is a SERIOUS problem with our work culture in the United States.
That still doesn’t change the fact that kids with the flu, etc. should not be at school. The flu is serious. It can be deadly to infants and those with weakened immune systems. It’s just not ok to put that risk on other students and their families.